i am a pastor
am i a pastor because i love the church
or do i love the church because i am a pastor
being a pastor has absolutely nothing to do with titles
most would agree
it has everything to do with condition
i find myself doing, thinking and saying things
that are an overflow of this condition of being a pastor
alot of times its super overwhelming and it just takes over
what a shame to think that i would need an
office
or desk
or button-up shirt
to be a pastor
or to be overwhelmed by my condition
freak that!
i am thinking of my friends
some in newport
whittier
kauai
east coast
and everywhere else
we all have these
these conditions
i think the trick is letting our condition take its coarse
if you encourage, let your encouragement take its coarse
if you instruct, let your instruction take its coarse
if you create, let your creativity take its coarse
and if you love, let your life takes its coarse
8.07.2009
7.24.2009
kauai day 2
its muggy and the mosquitoes are out. you can't escape this combo in kauai in july. but i wouldn't want to be any other place. we, jordan and i, are filling our hears with some instrumental ambiences thanks to the world of pandora radio. jordan contemplates some nursing materials. i peruse randomly on the internet. both, resting from an intense bike ride to Lihue.
sarah's ma and pa flew in last night so we stopped by their hotel room only after getting lost in a myriad of hallways and winding parking lots. they seem enthusiastic about their luxurious room.
before this we got to cruise the beaches, well a beach, of kauai. it rained like mad earlier and since the earth here is red the ocean looked like watered-down tomato soup. we swam despite the color. the water was ridiculously warm. i could have stayed there for hours. not very many tourists, but enough to frustrate the locals.
i think my favorite part(s) of the trip so far (and it's my prediction that they will continue to be my favorite) is dinner. i am like sarah and jordan's adopted son. i keep telling they to freakin adopt me but i think i am too old. freak that! anyways, the three of us will sit at their small dinning room table occupying three of the four sides. its intimate. reminiscing about the past and dreaming about the future we stuff our faces with homemade tacos. the conversation is always prime. my minds wanders to 1 john and how he wrote so deligently that we ought to love our brothers... (and sisters) and even it's this act, these acts of love, that we know we are children of God. i am encouraged because i know that i have love overwhelming my veins for these two. i am reminded we are bonded with love. i am reminded that we will always be.
kauai is good.
sarah's ma and pa flew in last night so we stopped by their hotel room only after getting lost in a myriad of hallways and winding parking lots. they seem enthusiastic about their luxurious room.
before this we got to cruise the beaches, well a beach, of kauai. it rained like mad earlier and since the earth here is red the ocean looked like watered-down tomato soup. we swam despite the color. the water was ridiculously warm. i could have stayed there for hours. not very many tourists, but enough to frustrate the locals.
i think my favorite part(s) of the trip so far (and it's my prediction that they will continue to be my favorite) is dinner. i am like sarah and jordan's adopted son. i keep telling they to freakin adopt me but i think i am too old. freak that! anyways, the three of us will sit at their small dinning room table occupying three of the four sides. its intimate. reminiscing about the past and dreaming about the future we stuff our faces with homemade tacos. the conversation is always prime. my minds wanders to 1 john and how he wrote so deligently that we ought to love our brothers... (and sisters) and even it's this act, these acts of love, that we know we are children of God. i am encouraged because i know that i have love overwhelming my veins for these two. i am reminded we are bonded with love. i am reminded that we will always be.
kauai is good.
love quotes
We know that we have passed from death to life, because we love our brothers.
Anyone who does not love remains in death.
Everyone who loves has been born of God and knows God.
Whoever does not love does not know God, because God is love.
Dear friends, since God so loved us, we also ought to love one another.
No one has ever seen God; but if we love one another, God lives in us and his love is made complete in us.
Whoever lives in love lives in God, and God in him.
There is no fear in love.
We love because he first loved us.
Whoever loves God must also love his brother.
This is the confidence we have in approaching God: that if we ask anything according to his will, he hears us. And if we know that he hears us—whatever we ask—we know that we have what we asked of him.
No one who lives in him keeps on sinning. No one who continues to sin has either seen him or known him.
And we ought to lay down our lives for our brothers.
extracted from john 1..
for those of you who love, be assured, you are children of God..
Anyone who does not love remains in death.
Everyone who loves has been born of God and knows God.
Whoever does not love does not know God, because God is love.
Dear friends, since God so loved us, we also ought to love one another.
No one has ever seen God; but if we love one another, God lives in us and his love is made complete in us.
Whoever lives in love lives in God, and God in him.
There is no fear in love.
We love because he first loved us.
Whoever loves God must also love his brother.
This is the confidence we have in approaching God: that if we ask anything according to his will, he hears us. And if we know that he hears us—whatever we ask—we know that we have what we asked of him.
No one who lives in him keeps on sinning. No one who continues to sin has either seen him or known him.
And we ought to lay down our lives for our brothers.
extracted from john 1..
for those of you who love, be assured, you are children of God..
7.23.2009
kauai day 1 (midday)
six minutes to the hour of 1pm and jordan and sarah's little one bedroom residence has been emptied of them both. jordan is at his nursing presentation while sarah is probably making some venti mocha coffee crap at starbucks, which leaves me here, in their little one bedroom residence hanging with myself.
its been three hours since i awoke for the day and i've done, i think anyways, everything i know to do: ate frosted flakes, an apple, washed my bowl and spoon, read some proverbs, read some kierkegaard, chatted on facebook, charged my phone, went outside, put away my bed, got dressed and even brushed my teeth. that's pretty freakin productive.
also, its monsoon(ing) like mad. the silence has been overcome by the persistent pouring of millions of heavy rain drops. i don't mind it though cause its semi-comforting and reminds me of india some. i think my favorite part though is the outside shower. barricaded by a 5-foot green fence, it's nestled behind a huge shrubbery. basic livin kauai style. i showered last night in it like a pro. it seemed as if i'd showered there millions of times before.
last night was eventful for sure. taco bell with sarah (first things first), cruise to get jordan at school, costco, fixed ride, caught up, ate chicken cesar salad as the day's final meal and tag-teamed a ferocious cane spider.
i've survived my first 24 hours. we'll see about the rest...
its been three hours since i awoke for the day and i've done, i think anyways, everything i know to do: ate frosted flakes, an apple, washed my bowl and spoon, read some proverbs, read some kierkegaard, chatted on facebook, charged my phone, went outside, put away my bed, got dressed and even brushed my teeth. that's pretty freakin productive.
also, its monsoon(ing) like mad. the silence has been overcome by the persistent pouring of millions of heavy rain drops. i don't mind it though cause its semi-comforting and reminds me of india some. i think my favorite part though is the outside shower. barricaded by a 5-foot green fence, it's nestled behind a huge shrubbery. basic livin kauai style. i showered last night in it like a pro. it seemed as if i'd showered there millions of times before.
last night was eventful for sure. taco bell with sarah (first things first), cruise to get jordan at school, costco, fixed ride, caught up, ate chicken cesar salad as the day's final meal and tag-teamed a ferocious cane spider.
i've survived my first 24 hours. we'll see about the rest...
7.18.2009
drive
what drives you
a question asked by my friend bij
now for my response
there are actually a lot of things that drive me
these things being people
persons with names and faces and stories
most of them young
some of them free
all of them perfect
their names are andy, justin, patty, max, laura, babaloo, brandon, marylin, brady, athena, brittany, ashley, brian, zach, mason, sydnee, tucker and ariel
they were, are and always will be my youth kids
what drives me the most is the thought of them being transformed by the God who grasps them and then living in a way that would honor that transforming, that experience; a complete abandonment of the world and its corrupt systems and futile endeavors for a life lived under the banner of Christ’s radical love led by the precious Holy Spirit
feel free to explore your answer
a question asked by my friend bij
now for my response
there are actually a lot of things that drive me
these things being people
persons with names and faces and stories
most of them young
some of them free
all of them perfect
their names are andy, justin, patty, max, laura, babaloo, brandon, marylin, brady, athena, brittany, ashley, brian, zach, mason, sydnee, tucker and ariel
they were, are and always will be my youth kids
what drives me the most is the thought of them being transformed by the God who grasps them and then living in a way that would honor that transforming, that experience; a complete abandonment of the world and its corrupt systems and futile endeavors for a life lived under the banner of Christ’s radical love led by the precious Holy Spirit
feel free to explore your answer
6.08.2009
subject vs. object
an object is what someone holds objective facts about while a subject is someone one knows intimately through shared experience. to view someone as an object is to limit that person within a set of linguistic boundaries to make this person known universally as an object. it is no longer through subjective experience that a person is known but through a list of words with clear definitions, thus limiting them to the definitions of those words and nothing more. basically the potential to know someone is quenched.
to view someone as a subject is to recognize that the potential to know them is unfathomable. it is to throw away the limitedness of words and engage this person who ends up defying all clear distinctions. you can only know a subject through subjective experience with them.
for example, let’s say that someone asks me to describe my friend travis. this is truly an impossibility. its because whatever word I use to describe him, travis always seems to defy this word and its limited definition although it may be true most of the time. an objective fact: travis is shy. although this may be true when he is around certain people I have seen him do things and say things that would completely and utterly defy the definition of shy. this is because a person can never be known (or made known) by objective facts and words. someone can only be really known by engaging with his or her soul; by being transformed by their life.
I think that most people would probably agree with this. but, what gets me is that if we understand that people can’t be known by objective truth and will end up defying labels we project upon them why do we do both these things to God as if He will fit into our mold or be confined nicely in the definitions of our language despite the eloquence or manner. defining and describing God are important, but if we believe that, afterwards, He must submit to the realm of our description we are no longer treating God as subject but as object. He is not an object to be grasped, but a God to be engaged, a power to be transformed by and a subject to be experienced.
to view someone as a subject is to recognize that the potential to know them is unfathomable. it is to throw away the limitedness of words and engage this person who ends up defying all clear distinctions. you can only know a subject through subjective experience with them.
for example, let’s say that someone asks me to describe my friend travis. this is truly an impossibility. its because whatever word I use to describe him, travis always seems to defy this word and its limited definition although it may be true most of the time. an objective fact: travis is shy. although this may be true when he is around certain people I have seen him do things and say things that would completely and utterly defy the definition of shy. this is because a person can never be known (or made known) by objective facts and words. someone can only be really known by engaging with his or her soul; by being transformed by their life.
I think that most people would probably agree with this. but, what gets me is that if we understand that people can’t be known by objective truth and will end up defying labels we project upon them why do we do both these things to God as if He will fit into our mold or be confined nicely in the definitions of our language despite the eloquence or manner. defining and describing God are important, but if we believe that, afterwards, He must submit to the realm of our description we are no longer treating God as subject but as object. He is not an object to be grasped, but a God to be engaged, a power to be transformed by and a subject to be experienced.
6.04.2009
the greatest cause
there once was two men. both strived to be faithful toward Jesus and New Testament teachings. both gave their lives to great causes, though they were much different from each other. the first read the New Testament and, in response to it, decided to move away from society to an isolated meadow where he dedicated his time to prayer, fasting, purity and holiness. for he believed that the most important thing was to keep his heart clean and untainted by the world. he decided to cut himself off from tv, movies, radio, internet and anything else that could potentially have a worldly influence on him. he lived the rest of his life utterly alone, for he continued to live in solitude out of fear that he might become a sinner if he lived near them. for he never wanted to compromise his holiness and loyalty to Jesus through contact with the evil of the world. it is said that he died with the purest yet emptiest heart.
the second man also read the New Testament. but instead of living a life of solitude, he decided to take Jesus’ command to love your neighbor very serious. he sold his possessions and gave his money to the poor, he spent a considerable amount of time with widows and orphans within his city and he visited those who were in prison. he spent all of his time with others and was such a strong advocate for the social gospel that he soon began to neglect his own heart and his integrity. grace soon lost its empowerment toward sanctification and had become a license for sin. he continued to serve and love others in spite of his idolatry and rebellion toward God. the story has it that he died the most fulfilled man yet with the coldest of hearts.
commentary // I wonder if either of these men would hear the words, “well done, my good and very faithful servant.” both represent two beautiful causes. yet, also, both neglected each other’s cause. in other words, both these men got it and totally missed it at the same time. purity of heart and social action belong together. there is no reason to see them as archenemies for both of them, together, equal the greatest cause of all: Christianity.
the second man also read the New Testament. but instead of living a life of solitude, he decided to take Jesus’ command to love your neighbor very serious. he sold his possessions and gave his money to the poor, he spent a considerable amount of time with widows and orphans within his city and he visited those who were in prison. he spent all of his time with others and was such a strong advocate for the social gospel that he soon began to neglect his own heart and his integrity. grace soon lost its empowerment toward sanctification and had become a license for sin. he continued to serve and love others in spite of his idolatry and rebellion toward God. the story has it that he died the most fulfilled man yet with the coldest of hearts.
commentary // I wonder if either of these men would hear the words, “well done, my good and very faithful servant.” both represent two beautiful causes. yet, also, both neglected each other’s cause. in other words, both these men got it and totally missed it at the same time. purity of heart and social action belong together. there is no reason to see them as archenemies for both of them, together, equal the greatest cause of all: Christianity.
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